I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
