Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize