You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
