Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Randomize
