jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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