Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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