You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
