I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
