I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Damn victory sex feels great
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
