batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
