Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
