Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
