I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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