hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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