ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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