It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
