I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
