I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
