I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
