ya dads aren't the best wingmen
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
