brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize