She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
