Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
