My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
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