hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
