Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
i think i just naturally attract stoners
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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