Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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