Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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