and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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