sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
