is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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