He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
They have beer where we have blood.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
