He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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