I'm lost and stupid without you.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
