So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Randomize
