I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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