new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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