yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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