escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
