careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
