...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
