I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
