My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
