They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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