But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
home. puking in laundry basket.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
