Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize