Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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