I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
