so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
