Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
