She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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